Ura

Ura

B

Ura was my grandmother. I named her Ura when I was a child. Her name was Rhea, so I called her "Ura" from a young age, trying hard to pronounce the name, but mis-pronouncing it by accident. She was my mom's mother. She was a good woman, but kind of bitchy. She was always very kind to me. I feel bad about this keyboard. God have mercy upon my poor pathetic soul. If you look down @ the keyboard, as you type, you will be less likely to make mistakes, because you can see your own hands, and where your fingers are leading. It is nice to have an outlet. Thank you for reading. I will type & tell you a story about my Grandmother. As I said, she was a good woman. I have emails to write to Kaka and other things, to do. Off of that for now. TELL the story about Ura. Ura said to me the night before she died, or two- well, anyway, the last time I saw her ever- to 'Take it easy, Boy,' or something like that: my Mom told me the story, I don't understand it... sorry. I was grappling after some puzzles in the closet. Are you gifted? It was a Peanuts Puzzle that I had put together when I was 10 or 11 or 12 or something like that, with Charlie Brown and Lucy & the whole crew: It only had about 64-puzzle pieces, so it wasn't that hard to put together. She died two nights later- I saw a purple electric bug zapper that was in her driveway, and I knew in that instant she was dead. She encouraged my art & my music. DON'T HATE ME- She encouraged my trumpet. She used to come to the pick me up from the Public School when I was 12. That was the last year I ever saw her. She had an obsession with tricks & Hints & puzzles. Momma says she thinks she kept a lot of secrets. She says she knows that about both of her parents. Ura had a big green vase in her house. Type-writing is FASTER than Writing. I did damage this keyboard though. She had a nice house. It was way out on the marsh, quiet. It was peaceful in there. We used to do things like play cards, and talk, and play board games. 'Guess Who' and Candyland stick out in my memory. She taught Marilyn how to play 'Solitaire,' but she never taught me. I guess I just didn't know how to listen. I tried to read Jack's favorite book, Shōgun, at her house, on her bed, which was a water-bed, in her guest-room, when I was 10. She encouraged my art. She said I was smart. I used to be. I went to Savannah Christian elementary school in the First grade. I remember one time, my dad forgot to pick me up from school, and I had to wait an hour or two before my mom eventually came by, but I also remember this other time, grandmother Ura -I HAVE TO PAY FOR WAR CRIMES- came by Savannah Christian and picked me up, telling me about The Adams Family Movie, which she thought was quite cute and charming- I liked the Ninja Turtles and Mario. I recall one time I was talking w/ my friend @ the lunch table all about the secret tricks & Characters in Mario I, the ORIGINAL. We had our lunch and shared a table and I had a Mario I lunch box. I shit my pants another day. Someone else said Don't Worry About it, it'll all be All good In the end. DON'T HATE ME. RELAX. The reason I brought up all of that stuff about First Grade was that URA was the one who payed for it all. She was interested in getting us a good education. She arranged for us to get into the Arts Academy, or the Bartow Elementary, or the MAGNET PROGRAM, or whatever you call it. I know. Exactly. It got fucked up in the end. That's where I met Joseph & all of that stuff, but that will come later, okay? Ura had a guest at her house. He was a man, and he taught me about video games. You see, I had this hand-held video game, and he told me exactly what I needed to know in order to play it the BEST. I don't remember what that was, exactly, only. Once I tried to teach Ura how to play Super Mario Bros. But she threw up her hands and despaired because she died when she fell into a hole trying to catch a Mushroom. She made a joke, like, I was trying to save my own life, but I lost it in the process. She loved Rush Limbaugh. She thought he was knowledgeable, or intelligent. She didn't care that he was a conceited prik: She had a Nice House. Once, when she bought me a truck, I made a joke, saying: Grandmother Ura, I don't like my truck! And she said, I'm sorry, Honey...why not?! And I said, I LOVE It! Haha. The joke's on her. I remember now, we used to have a game where we would say: where's your phone? And one of us would know, but the other wouldn't, so the one who KNEW, would say (as the other would move around the house) you're getting WARMER, or you're getting COLDER. WARMER or COLDER? warmer or colder until we found it. Highly depressing. Just jokin' with ya. I need to focus, and concentrate. I need practice to become a better writer. Quit digressing. Ura was Mom's daughter. No, that doesn't sound right/she was her Mother. That sounds right. Would you like to be influential? How influential are you? Stay focused. As I said earlier, she encouraged my Trumpet Playing. She said, practice, practice, practice, practice. She told me the story of the Gift of the Magi, and that if I wanted Money, I would have to earn it; all the good people go about getting their money by earning it. That was in the back of a car, going where, I don't know. She also told me, on that trip, that she knew of a relative who blew his hand-off with a cherry-bomb, a hand- grenade. At another time, we were young, we were at Hair salon, there were women having their hair cleaned in lean-back sinks, and she told me the story of Gulliver and the Liliputians, how they tied him down, how they were tiny in comparison to him. Last year I read Gulliver's Travels. It was good. I read it in Ernie's book. I was only able to read the first couple of Chapters/the latter were cut-out. I had to go to the library to pick up the rest. Ura once took me to the O.M. Public library in Savannah. I remember hangin' out in that room to the left of the Front door. They were trying to get their books strait. It was something to do with the classification system. Later, she told me about Noah's Ark. It was beautiful. She told me of how he obeyed and listened to God, and then God gave him the rainbow sign. There must have been a rainbow in the sky. YOU CAN SEE THAT? I DON'T BELIEVE IN GHOSTS. ANGELS ARE REAL/GHOSTS ARE REAL, BUT ONLY INSIDE YOUR MIND. I can remember seeing the rainbow, now. It was colorful: red & violet & purple & Orange: Beauty surrounds us. Beauty is here every day, if we are just Open enough to LOOK FOR IT. About 6 times, Ura would pick us up and ride us to 'Ronnie's'. Ronnie's was an ice-cream shop out on 1-16 towards Pooler, by the Airport. Actually, it was just a restaurant. It was just a regular restaurant, that sold things like Hamburgers & french fries and potato salad. I would always get ice-cream, however. It had a juke-box. There were some other patrons, there. They were like southern hicks. She also showed me Potato Salad; I did not Like it, at first. I thought it tasted like shit. It took some time before I grew into it. I was in middle school when she died. This was all in Middle school, also. Ura gave me a copy of Beethoven's Ninth Symphony on CD. It came in a White & Gold case: it was a very special recording: I had it til I lost it in Aberdeen. Some punk got it. Stop complaining. Just get w. it. I may have put some guy through prison in Aberdeen, I don't know. DIDN'T HAVE ANY SUGAR. Katharine & the family hung out together once when we were younger. We hung out at the park, with a swingset. Good day. I need a lot more good days like that. Bea & Nora need a lot more good days like that, too.  I wore a set of Superman pajamas at Ura's House. I hung out underneath the porch of her house. Her maid Sally commented. I was 6 or less. It was good day, too. bright. Ura took us down to Universal Studios once. Me and Marilyn. We saw long lines, hotel rooms, monkeys, trainers, cotton candy, Tourism, t shirts, South of The Border... Ura payed for us to go into this mad fun house, with a lot of misleading mirrors and light an- sounds. On the way over, we had the windshield wipers beating out a rhythm against the windshield. I was afraid Ura was gonna crash, 'cause it was raining hard. My favorite song came on the radio. It was 'Splish-Splash-I-was-takin-a-Bath. ALL About a SATURDAY NIGHT!' We saw red Georgia clay and kudzu on the side of the road. I'm sure she rode us to Atlanta at least once. I remember once, while we were passing through one of those underground passes they have (those massive tunnels with the orange lights along the walls), Marilyn and I SCREAMED in Ura's ears! I used to say, you had to say 'I'm a Good Little Boy', every time you drive past in the car past the airport running strip they have as you pass Hunter Army Airfield from the left, it's bad luck, otherwise. At Universal Studios we hung out in the hotel room, and Ura payed for us to have our film taken, shooting each other, riding in a boat, being Hollywood Movie stars. We were supplanted onto a Green Screen Image, and it looked like we were hangin' out w/ other stars from the past, like Al Capone Audrey Hepburn and King Kong. It only cost $15, and we got to keep that tape for life. I want to watch it again. It was in Florida. We hung out at the swimming pool. The lifegaurd told me not to run!!! Ura told us our great-great grandfather, or somebody like that, founded the Original Golf-Course in Augusta, GA, where the Nationals are held, or something like that. My great grandfather on my Mom's DAD'S side built Memorial Stadium, and DeRenne Middle school. He a Great Contractor, named Olaf Otto, I need more pussy. Do you want to give it to me? Ura had a ring-tone on 'er door-bell. It rang MI-DO-RE-SO. SO-RE-MI-DO- That was all. It was a good ring tone. Actually, her door-bell was programmable; it had a little box on her wall next to the front door, on the inside, that you could program different songs into, by pressing the buttons; Ernie had a programmable light-box-house, that programmed songs, too. You know, melodies. Actually, hers was a wind-up toy that only played ONE MELODY. I have yet to recall what that Melody was. Care to jog my MEMORY? Perhaps it's still lyin' around the old Tybee house. God bless it. I've made this house dirty, I've tried though. -I was in your lives before you even knew me.- God forgive me, and god bless me. Ura had a maid named Sally. She's still living in Sandfly. Send her a Divine blessing. She had a hired worker named 'Louis' I admired the man, admired him and looked up to him. He was an alcoholic, a womanizing man, and he smoked a little. I don't know what they said about that man. He seemed pretty cool to me/my dad didn't like him. He saw me walking along the edge of the swimming pool. He drove up in 'is Cadillac. I heard that Cadillacs were supposed to be Really nice cars. That same day, I pulled the cat's tail. The cat didn't like that. He or she ran away from me & didn't come back. That was on the front porch of the house. My SUPERMAN Costume was Blue, red, & yellow. I felt handsome & confident. All the ladies like my sister, my mom, aunt Sally, my grandma, and Aunt Katharine LOVED IT! Daddy and Louis just gave me the thumbs up, encouraged me, and said 'You go get 'em, boy.' I never met my Grandpa' Walter. He died before I was born. Too shameful. It was the cigarettes. Same thing that got Grandma'. Shame, shame. What can you do, in the long run? In one family video we filmed, Grandma' Ura put her hands on the ceiling; she was up-side down- Actually, the camera was up-side down. I said PIANO. BART SIMPSON JOHNNY DEPP MARTINIS OLIVES EAT RED MEAT RAW SMUSHY BANANAS WHITE CHOCOLATE IN THE FRIDGE, NEIGHBOR DOWNSTAIRS, KICKED A SOCCER BALL DAMN! O MY GOODNESS! KAKA 40-SOMETHIN'. LONG TIME AGO. BOB- MYSTERIES, ILLUSIONS, SLIDE SHOW IN THE HOUSE, ROUND HOUSE, TISH, BOB IN THE YARD-